In the Here and Now 6/23/10

Recently I've started reading an intriguing book that a friend lent me. The book was written by a man by the name of Osho, it is titled Courage The Joy of Living Dangerously. I've only just begun this book, however, already it has proved to be immensely interesting to me. Osho looks at life from a perspective that I have never before considered. Since I have started reading I have constantly been thinking of my own life and how I identify with the world. So fellow readers, I figured I'd share one small snippet of my thoughts with you…maybe get you thinking as well. :)

Until this last year I have never realized, to the extent I do now, the importance of simply living in the moment. I feel that in the past I have set goals for myself having decided that I will reach these aspirations no matter what. As result, I believe I have almost neglected truly living in the present. It's not that I haven't been content with my life, it's simply that I have, in a small way, been over anticipating the next step I need to take to progress in life. I am now focusing on merely being present in the moment, every moment, every day. A wise friend of mine once pointed out that "time is just something that we construct, let it go." I am now striving to 'let go' of the timetable that humans seem to create. Instead, I am now working solely on living in the now. My ballet teacher I took from growing up chose a song for me to do my final lyrical dance to before leaving her studio…"This Is My Now" by Jordin Sparks

There was a time I packed my dreams away
Living in a shell, hiding from myself

There was a time when I was so afraid
I thought I'd reached the end
Baby that was then
But I am made of more than my yesterdays

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment
Cuz I look around
I can't believe the love I see
My fears behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubts
That was then, this is my now

Had to decide was I gonna play it safe
Or look somewhere deep inside
and try to turn the tide
Find the strength to take that step of faith

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment
Cuz I look around
I can't believe the love I see
My fears behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubts
That was then, this is my now

And I have the courage like never before, yeah
I've settled for less but I am ready for more
Ready for more
This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment
Cuz I look around
I can't believe the love I see
My fears behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubts
That was then, this is my now

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment
Cuz I look around
I can't believe the love I see
My fears behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubts
That was then, this is my now

This is my now

In reality, I don't think 'fears and doubts' should ever dissipate from a person's life. "Courage is not the absence of fear…it is, rather, the total presence of fear, with the courage to face it." (-Osho) Fears and doubts help to create a portion of what makes life intriguing, what pushes you beyond what you believe you have the capacity to achieve. I wholeheartedly agree with the idea that "This is my now." From now on I will strive to live nowhere but in the moment.

Hero 6/13/10

Hello blogging world! I have decided I thoroughly enjoy blogging, so despite having just blogged yesterday, have made time to blog more today. :)

A few months ago my Dad started to have a lot of swelling in his legs and feet, although hesitant to meet with the doctor he finally made the decision to go in a few weeks ago. When he went in they discovered that there is something going on with his heart. Today he had a meeting with the cardiologist to find out results from his tests…the test results weren’t what we were hoping for…an appointment will be made soon to determine whether or not open heart surgery is necessary.

As I talked to my Mom to find out what went down at the doctor, and have thought since, I haven’t known where to place my emotions. Instead I have again determined one truth that I’ve known my entire life, my Dad amazes me; he has and always will be one of my hero’s. Never have I met anyone as positive and happy as my Dad despite the trials that have been thrown at him in life.

He approaches everything as an optimist, and remains so, no matter the circumstances. Dean Acheson once said “I learned from the example of my father, that the manner in which one endures what must be endured is more important than the thing that must be endured.” This quote reigns true in my Father’s example for me; he will forever be my exemplar.

I once read that ‘the road to success always seems to be under construction’…I think life would get old fast if we didn’t have detours along our paths. In fact I think it’s all the rocks hitting our windshields, mud on our tires, and bugs on our windows that help to shape who we ultimately are, and the way that people see us…they allow us to develop our personality! You really wouldn’t appreciate a clean car if you didn’t know a dirty one. (Haha, I think this analogy came about because I washed and vacuumed my car today! It looks impeccable lol.)

So in conclusion, I’m thankful for my Dad’s example. Not necessary for what we found out today, but for the way that he approaches it, and for the way that this rock is shaping us. If I can amount to a portion of what my Dad is to me, I know I’ll be successful in life. I’m a lucky gal to have him. Till next time!

Bowling 6/12/10

Today we celebrated Little T's (Tiffany's) birthday. (her birthday's really the 14th of June, she'll be out of town!) She decided that for her birthday she wanted to go bowling. Despite getting rather distracted by the camera we all had a great time. Holly took her A-Game and won both of the games we played!

Frita (Me!), and Frita (Holly)



My Little Butchero/Butch/Paigey Panzy (French Accent is necessary) (Paige), Frita (Holly), Mother/Mama (pronounced like a gangsta) (Mom)



Butch (Paige), Frita (Me), Mother (Mom), Little T/ Lil' T (Tiffany)



After we went bowling, we went out to dinner at Cafe Rio (Lil' T's choice, but also my favorite) and watched a movie. I love spending time with my fam! I think that T had a happy birthday, haha, I know that I had fun celebrating with her. :)

Lagoon 6/10/10

To say that my parents have never been keen on the idea of taking my family to Lagoon is a bit of an understatement. I grew up living approximately an hour away from the park, and yet, can only remember going once when I was a tiny girl…My family was enthusiastic about going to Disneyland…why not Lagoon?

A few days ago my sister called my Mom letting her know that she had some tickets to the park from work for just $10.00. She then proceeded to extend an invitation to us to join her, we did. The prospect of finally finding out what people find so enticing about Lagoon, and experiencing it for myself, left me looking forward to the trip.

I arrived at Lagoon around 11:30 to find my sister and Mom kindly waiting for me at the front gates. We went into the park and rode rides for a bit. I haven't ridden a roller coaster for a couple years, but expected to enjoy it as I always did growing up…I was stunned to discover that I don't think I enjoy amusement parks much!

I used to brush away any nausea and headaches that I got from riding rides, but today I saw absolutely no point in making my body feel sick. Turns out, I actually prefer something a little less boisterous than sitting in a cart with my head pressed against a seat so I don't get whip lash, trying to watch a track so I don't get sick, piercing music penetrating around me, loud voices everywhere, dirty everything, and crowds galore.

While there we noticed that there was a performance at 1:30. I normally enjoy performances and suggested we watch. The show consisted of eight young women and men that sang and danced to different Broadway songs. I felt like I was watching people at a get-together that decided to group up and put on a show for the party-goers. I was appalled…I looked around to see if everyone else was as well, only to discover people genuinely impressed by what they were watching. As I sat through most of the show looking around and thinking (I had a rather difficult time watching what was happening on stage, and left early) I realized that I'm relieved that's not all I've been exposed to, and that I'm glad I wasn't impressed by what was happening. I'm thankful I've learnt what is and isn't good dancing, singing, and acting. I'm also really happy that I've been able to experience professional performances, and that technologies advanced enough that I can search for quality performances, and find what does intrigue me.

The one ride that I did enjoy, that I could do over and over again is the rocket. You sit in a seat, with a harness so you don’t fly out, and then you shoot straight up very quickly. I like it because you can see so far when you get to the top of the ride, you lose your stomach on the way up and down, and I get nervous and full of adrenaline before it blasts the group in the air (especially because you don't know exactly when you will be blasted up). That ride was wonderful.

I suppose I will never fully understand why adults are drawn to Lagoon. Experiencing the park firsthand was…well, I'm not quite sure how to articulate what it was (other than what I've already mentioned). Regardless, I'm very happy to be home. My Lagoon day was totally different than I imagined it would be, I'm glad I got in for the price I did. I have also learned things about myself today that I didn't expect to learn. Namely, I feel like I'm more aware of my body than I used to be, in terms of what does and doesn't feel good (roller coasters don't). Second, I prefer less over more (I'm talking music, noise, attractions, people, etc.), I think I enjoy learning, or touring, or just doing something somewhat relaxing instead, and finally, I learned that I'm in absolute harmony with my parents opinions on Lagoon lol.

6/5/10 Tandem Ride

So, Saturday morning I woke up to find out that two of my sisters and our friend were going on a double tandem bike ride from my house up to the Herriman reservoir. They needed another rider, so I happily consented to go. Realizing that it was sunny outside, and not wanting to get a horrible tan line, but also not deeming it appropriate to wear my swimming suit as I biked across the valley, I stuck on bikers, (how fitting :)) and a tank top. We were off.

I thoroughly enjoyed that it was warm outside, not too hot, and not too cold. The reason that the Herriman reservoir was chosen to be our destination was because the ride there is primarily uphill, leaving the ride back home mostly downhill.

Tandem riding is great fun, my sister and I got our bike for Christmas a few ago and it has been well used. In fact the bike has been so well used that every once in awhile when riding the chain will get caught, if you know the bike, you can pedal backwards a certain amount and get the chain fixed while riding and continue onward with no problem. We found this obnoxiously necessary to do throughout the ride.

After riding awhile we came to the hills against the southern mountains of the valley that we needed to climb to reach our destination (Okay, we only actually had to get about a fourth the way up the mountain). We determined that this would be best achieved by obtaining as much momentum as possible and then pedaling up the hill, subsequent to the first hill we would continue climbing the other hills by just going off of brute strength…it didn’t work. The chain kept repeatedly getting caught, so while we were going uphill we would have to try and pedal backwards a bit so that we could keep riding the bike. After pedaling backwards all momentum would be gone, and we were not strong enough to continue riding…in short we looked ridiculous. Walking up the last two hills was humiliating; nevertheless, we finally made it to the reservoir.

Herriman reservoir is a quaint little place that immediately lightened my previously peeved mood that had set in while walking up the hills. I set down our bike and saw that my sister was sticking her feet in the water; because I didn’t want to take off my shoes I opted to sticking my finger in the water for a second instead. Surprisingly the water was not ice cold, I now plan on going swimming there sometime this summer. Sunny as it was we decided that perhaps we ought to put on sunscreen before venturing home.

The highlight of our adventure was the view while coasting down the mountain. We could see across the entire valley, and had nothing but cool air blowing onto our hot faces. Not being especially familiar with Herriman caused me to take a different route home than I initially had in mind, but we made it in a direct pathway avoiding hills that I thought we would have to climb on our return! Two and a half hours later I bounced into my house grateful for air conditioning. Since this escapade I look like a lobster. An uneven lobster, I am redder on the left side of my body (it took much longer to go uphill than it did down). All in all I have concluded that I had a great time, hopefully I’ll go on another bike ride again sometime this summer!

Blogging

Never in my life did I think I would be a blogger. Yet, here I am…blogging. In all honesty I have thought about starting a blog for quite sometime, however, have never acted upon it because I didn’t want to risk having people read what I have to say and taking offense. I have come to the realization that no matter whom someone is, or what one says, speculation will always be prevalent. My sincere desire with this blog is to record life from my perspective. I hope that if you choose to read my blog you keep in mind that this blog is for me to talk about life the way I see it. Never will I say anything to intentionally antagonize anyone or anything. If offense is ever taken, please talk to me about it, and/or simply stop reading my posts. : ) Reasoning for my blog is simple enough, I enjoy writing, getting my ideas and thoughts out, and a blog seemed like a simple way to do so. I enjoy hearing others ideas also, so please, don’t hesitate to give feedback!